November 13, 2004 - Self-serving?

I sometimes worry that my desire to be clergy is self-serving. I'm not sure if this is an effect of my fear of becoming an ego-maniacal bastard (a fear I've had for years) or if it's because I think it's right to think about these things.

I'm extremely self-reflective. I think that's why I can laugh so much at myself. I generally know what my motives are, and I rarely do anything without considering the consequences.

Perhaps I don't look hard enough at the consequences of my actions. I often don't really care why I'm doing something. Certain things slip through my ethics screen sometimes. Heck, on certain days, I think that "screen" is more like a sieve. It just lets everything through.

This is something I'm working on.

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