The Phantom's Memiors

It isn't right
That such beauty
Can bring such
Saddness
To my heart.
I can't say
That life is horrid
Or something
To be dreaded.
But as the sky
Is lit up
By lightning
I think only sad thoughts
Of those things past
Or of the world
That crashes down
About me.
What I could enjoy
Could give me life
Or make me love
Is not near me.
A candle is lit
To give me light
The gift only sparsely given
To a world of evils
I can't get out of
My mind.
Why can't I love
Those who love me back?
Perhaps it is simply
That I don't understand
Or life is something
Lost
To myself
Or shortened
By petty greed.
Perhaps I'm too demanding
Wishing for
Something that does not
Exist.
I see my reflection
By candlelight
In the window
Ghostly
Transparent
Dark as my soul.
Is this what others see
When I turn to them
And stare
Because words hate me?
Life is always against me
Randomly choosing
Places to decieve me
Or give me the gift
Of Love
When I cannot accept it.
But the blame rests nowhere
If not on my own soul
Because my soul
Is black as night
And you are bright
As day.
The Moon above
Never loved me
Nor did the Goddess
I meant to win
By a charm
I never possessed.
Some things in life
May be attractive
But not I
And I don't see
What draws you near
To a monster
Such as I.
Should I be placed
Inside a hell
So terrible Imagination
Could never touch
My shriveled heart?
I doubt I could stand
Separation
Like that from you.
But what if I wanted
To sleep
Or dream a dream
That will never end?
You wouldn't let me
Because if I slept
I might never
Awaken.
But the dream is over
And the lightning begins
Again.
So I extinguish
The candle
And rely again
On the lightning
To give me what
I need
To survive.
Saddness again
Overcomes my heart
And teardrops
Fall from the clouds
Pattering against
The ground.
My final thought
Is that
I love you.

Content © 2003, Michael J Dangler
Updated on 02/18/2003. Site Credits / Email Me!
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